Fun with scammers

No Scheme or Lisp content today. I was amusing myself for a while with this email exchange. The strings of digits are courtesy www.random.org. I even found a site that creates fake Western Union receipts.

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Hello,

I'm writing this with tears in my eyes,my family and I came down here to Edinburgh Scotland for a short vacation unfortunately we were mugged at the park of the hotel where we stayed,all cash,credit card and cell were all stolen from us but luckily for us we still have our passports with us.

We've been to the embassy and the Police here but they're not helping issues at all and our flight leaves in few hrs from now but we're having problems settling the hotel bills and the hotel manager won't let us leave until we settle the bills the amount needed now is just $2,700..I am so confused right now and thank God i wasn't injured because I complied immediately. Waiting to hear from you. Robert

I sent this message to Bob's other account:


I just got this message that supposedly came from you. It is plausible enough that your friends might fall for it! You should email your friends and assure them that you are OK and to NOT SEND MONEY
~jrm

Thanks for checking on me, well the message is from me and not a hoax. I'm presently stuck in UK and really in a bad situation.....I have been talking to the lazy embassy but it's taking them time process me help, and it's hard to get hold of a phone, that was why I had to send out email for help....I need a financial help with getting back home...all i need is $2,700.,but anything you could assist with now be helpful ..let me if can you have the money wire to me through western union

Thanks. 

Robert

I'm glad to hear your email is ok, it would be terrible to be mugged and hacked. Where do you need it sent?
~jrm

 Glad you replied back. I am full of panic now and the police only asked me to write a statement about the incident and directed me to the embassy,i have spoken to the Consulate here but they are not responding to the matter effectively,I really need your help to get myself out of this place. Well all i need now is just $2,700 but any amount you can afford will be appreciated, you can have it wired to my name via Western Union i'll have to show my passport as ID to pick it up here and i promise to pay you back as soon as i get back home.

 Here's the info you need at western union location below

 Name: Robert G 

Address: 48 Princes Street, Edinburgh, Scotland 

 Kindly email me the transfer details as soon as you have it done.Please let me know if you are heading out to western union now. 

Thanks

Robert

 What's going on?

 I was only able to wire $300 (I hit the limit on my ATM). I can send a lot more tomorrow, but will you have time to get it?
 ~jrm

 Please Let me have the western union confirmation number # M.T.C.N, so i can be able to pick up the Money. I'm freaked out at the moment please keep me posted. 

 Robert. 

 Robert, did you receive the money? Are you still in trouble? Is there anything more I can do?

 Thanks for your effort,Let me have the western union confirmation number # M.T.C.N. Awaiting for your reply. 

 Robert 

I left him dangling on this one.

 What's going on? 

 Robert . 

 My apologies, Robert, (I know you are in trouble, but I do have to sleep at times!) The MTCN is 2665592734

HOWEVER!!! IMPORTANT!!!!

I didn't want to broadcast that over email because it could be read by someone unscrupulous. So I added in your wife's birth date. Just subtract that out to get the real tracking number. I hope you can figure that out. Please let me know. If you want, I have an additional $500 I can send right away.

 What's going on,I just got back from Western Union and i was told there was no record for the transaction,kindly check the receipt and get back to me with the correct confirmation # 

 Awaiting to reply. 

 Robert .

 Trip number 1.  I'm shocked it didn't work.

What?! Did you remember to subtract your wife's birth date from the number I gave you?

 Omg!! I am full of panic now,Let me have the scanned receipt For Payment giving to you by the Western Union Agent.

Uh oh.  I'm busted... maybe I can vamp a bit....

How can I do that? You know I don't have a scanner. I've got an idea! What's the phone number of the hotel that is giving you problems? I'll call the manager myself and put it on my credit card.

No reply.  I was going to give up but it occurred to me to check for an on-line receipt generator (they have everything on line, don't they?) They do.  I sent him a nice receipt.

 Good news! I found a scanner. Please let me know if everything is ok.

 Thanks for your help.. i just got the money but there seems to be a problem with the conversion rate, i noticed the money came out here in $300but all i need is $2,700 as i requested, don't know that the conversion is that low, please i will need your further assistance so i will be needing $2,400. Please let me know when you will be heading out to western union. Waiting to read from you.

Hmm, he read the receipt, but didn't make a Western Union run.  I'll string him along a bit.

 I'll have to go by the bank (again) to get an additional check. I should be able to do that after work, in a few hours. Hang in there! I'm very worried.

 Ok,I will be waiting ,Do e-mail the full Western Union Transfer Details once you have it done. 

 Keep me posted.

 Robert.

I'm trying to get the guy to go `off script'.

 URGENT
 Robert, I need to know if you want the money in US Dollars, GB Pounds, or Euros, and what the exchange rate is. Can you get back to me as soon as you can? I'm really sorry about this, hope you are surviving.

No reply.  Better dangle some cash.

 I sent some more money. Did you get it? Is everything all right?

 OK...Can i have the full transfer details (MTCN) so i will be able to pick up the money. Waiting to read from you. 

 Thanks Robert.

 The MTCN is 4677254413 Please let me know when you get it!

 Are you there? 

 Robert, did you receive the money? Are you still in trouble? Is there anything more I can do?

 Let me have the confirmation details # M.T.C.N. Awaiting for your urgent reply. Robert 

 Please do get back to me with the Western Union Control Number M.T.C.N# Please Keep me posted. 

 Robert 

 This guy just has a one-track mind.  It seems impossible to get him `off script'.

Robert,
What is going on? Are you all right?

 I just checked with Western Union and they say you haven't picked up either of the two wires that I sent! Are you having difficulty getting them?

 The Western Union Control Number M.T.C.N # are these:
 2665591653 --- amount $300
 3207519347 --- amount $500

 Please let me know if you have any problems retrieving the money.
 ~jrm

 Are you kidding me or what,cause i was told at western union office the money you sent to me was not there. Please Let me know what's going on am freaked out here. 

 Robert.

 Yes!  Trip number 2.  He's probably figured out I'm playing him, though.  Let's goad him into one more trip.  A bit of an insane rant to allay his suspicions and we'll sweeten the pot just a bit more...

I don't know what to say, Robert. Perhaps they have a different system in Edinburgh and the numbers don't match? Are you sure that you are telling them the right numbers and didn't get them mixed up?

 I checked with Western Union, and the agent told me that the money was there and that you didn't pick it up. Why don't you go to the Royal Bank of Scotland? They are at 4 Princess Street, right around the corner from where you are staying. They should be able to straighten this out right away.

 I'm surprised you suggest that I am kidding. Why would I be so cruel? I have $800 on the line, and I'm doing this for your benefit. I'm not the victim here, you are. Do you think I would wire you this kind of money and then make a joke about it? Do you think I get a kick out of imagining you walk back and forth to Western Union for no reason? This is a bad situation and you seem to think I'm making it worse! I'm not sure you are taking this as seriously as I am. Are you sure you didn't get injured?

 I'm going to try this one more time, and I expect action on your part. I have wired an additional $200 dollars for a total of One Thousand ($1000) dollars. I really cannot afford any more, so I hope this is enough. The details are these: 

Sender: Joseph Marshall
 Receiver: Robert G, 48 Princess Street, Edinburgh Scotland
 Amount: $1000.00 (One Thousand) 
Money Transfer Control Number: 1822631749
 Transfer Fee: 50.00
 Number: 10341731365

 And I am enclosing a receipt. Please be sure to get these details correct. I am awaiting to hear that you have collected the cash.
 ~jrm

The receipt was fake and I included a “security question”: Who's your daddy? I was sure this would tip my hand, but....

 Robert, it has been 7 hours since I sent this. Did you get it?
 ~jrm

No i didn't,I will like to go back to western union and make this complain to them that all the confirmation number they give you was invalid ok..

YES!  Three trips!  Well, that's good enough for me.